I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize