Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
