PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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