i think my tv is drunk
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize