I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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