Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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