how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
