if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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