I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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