I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize