The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
So many bounce houses so little time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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