so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize