Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
