Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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