girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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