What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
