# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
