I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
