The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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