Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
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