Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
