I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
