i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize