My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
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