You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
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Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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