I think scott just propositioned me for sex
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
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I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
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just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
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