May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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