Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Randomize
