Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
