did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
