What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
