this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I just gargled with NyQuil
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
