what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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