I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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