Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
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