My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
