i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
