I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize