you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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