Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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