Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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