Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
