you would pick up someone in the library
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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