dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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