yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
