Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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