I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
