...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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