like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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