DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
